16.Aug.14 1 week ago
16.Aug.14 1 week ago

What Countries Call Themselves

  • Italy: Italia
  • Germany: Deutschland
  • Japan: 日本 (Nihon)
  • France: France (in a super cool accent)
  • China: 中国 (Zhōngguó)
  • England: The United Kingdom
  • Russia: Россия (Rossiya)
  • Canada: Canada
  • America: THE GREATEST GODDAMNED COUNTRY IN THE WHOLE ENTIRE WORLD TASTE MY FREEDOM WHAT NOW ENGLAND IN YOUR FACE
16.Aug.14 1 week ago
  • me as a pedestrian: [catwalks slowly across street as 90 cars pile up behind each other trying to turn; throws modelesque glance backwards over designer shades] [car inches into crosswalk] HOW DARE YOU COME WITHIN FIVE FEET OF ME!? I HAVE THE FUCKING RIGHT OF WAY??? SEE YOU IN COURT YOU CAPITALIST, PLANET-DESTROYING SCUM
  • me driving: say your prayers
16.Aug.14 1 week ago

watching porn

  • while you're horny: YOOOOOO
  • after you cum: ew
15.Aug.14 1 week ago
15.Aug.14 1 week ago

u gotta keep a lot a shit to yourself

(Source: ybnix, via 5aleha-zekra)

15.Aug.14 1 week ago