honksy:

*on my deathbed*

nurse: do you have any last words

me: i………..regret……being so……m…..mean………and heartless…………….

*the light goes out of my eyes*

*a small piece of paper falls out of my hand*

*the paper says one word only*

“sike”

(via mememaster)

21.May.13 1 hour ago
21.May.13 4 hours ago
21.May.13 5 hours ago

sassminsterabbey:

weaponsandtranquility:

sassminsterabbey:

party hosting 101: replace your drinking alcohol with methyl alcohol and then watch all your guests go blind, have seizures, puke and eventually die. 

this here is why bloggers can’t host parties.

what made you think i wanted my guests to have a good time

(via sammys-life)

21.May.13 6 hours ago
21.May.13 6 hours ago
21.May.13 7 hours ago

deathofadeity:

iamwizz:

The year is 2060. iPhone 842 is released. The screen touches you

Half of tumblr finally gets laid

(via thatswhattheythought)

21.May.13 9 hours ago